The Email: 3 Ways to Handle Rejection and Overcome Setbacks

Ever had one of those days when you’ve labored for hours with sweat and tears on a project but encountered a significant setback? I did this week. Here’s my story. . .

Last Monday, I was leading a conference call and briefly looked at my phone to check emails. One of the subject lines caught my attention, “Changes at Tenet.” I immediately opened the email and read the grim news, “Unfortunately, this means that the representation agreement between you and our agency will be terminated”… .Ugh.

I began writing The Discipled Leader in 2010. I’ve invested countless hours on The Discipled Leaderbecause I believe its message is critical in today’s world. I ask the question, “How does one connect his or her secular and spiritual life in their business, community or school and become stronger leaders?” I believe we become better leaders through knowing and following Jesus; through discipleship. 

Since I began writing, I collaborated with two editors to complete a 10-chapter, 67,000-word manuscript. I attended a writer’s conference, began writing a bi-weekly blog, trained groups of people, attended platform building courses and employed a digital marketing firm to build awareness. I even secured book endorsements from Dan Cathy, CEO Chick-fil-a, Paul Martinelli, President of the John Maxwell Team and Bryant Wright, Lead Pastor of Atlanta’s Johnson Ferry Baptist Church. 

But my most significant milestone was signing with a literary agency, Tenet. My agent was Waldo. I’ll never forget Waldo’s call to me last April. After a long period of consideration, Tenet would sign me and represent The Discipled Leader to publishers. It seemed a lifelong dream was coming true.

The challenge is I rarely ever heard from Waldo. I’d send emails, leave voicemails, and send texts with little or no response. When I did hear from him, I’d ask about his strategy and approach. I never received specifics other than he’d sent my book proposal to top publishers and was awaiting email responses. He only told me that silence in the publishing industry is a good thing and the process may take 18 to 24 months to find a publisher. Not very assuring but I decided to trust him.

I’ve also been praying diligently for God’s help. Author and Pastor Andy Stanley says that God-given vision requires God intervention. Meaning, if God gave you a vision or dream, he will make it come true. I’ve been talking to God about the vision he gave me and seeking his help to get the book into the hands of people that need to read it.

That’s why the email subject line caught my attention last week; “Changes at Tenet” . . .

Good morning, Preston:

I am writing today to let you know that as a result of some health struggles, I have made the difficult decision to step away from agenting, effective immediately. Tenet will not be replacing me at any point in the near future. Unfortunately, this means that the representation agreement between you and Tenet will be terminated– you should expect to receive a termination letter from Tenet’s president in the next week or so. 

You are free to seek new representation immediately. If you need any guidance in this area, feel free to reach out. My Tenet email will be online through May 1st, but I can also be reached on my personal email… .It has been a privilege to work with you, and I’ll be praying for your success!

REJECTED!

I reached out to Tenet’s president for reconsideration but to no avail. He said they were keeping four of Waldo’s agented authors and didn’t have the capacity to represent me. He wrote:

It [The Discipled Leader] is an important topic, and the presentation is well done; your social media is improving steadily, but it is not yet what our publishers would consider successful. It wouldn’t be fair to your next agent to continue down the path we’ve gone, so I’ll be sending out a letter today confirming our decision. A fresh pair of eyes may be just what the project needs to get over the hump.

REJECTED AGAIN!

The funny thing is that I’m at peace with it. I truly believe that God engineers all circumstances and this setback is just part of the journey. While my search for a new agent begins again, I’ve made the decision not to become bitter or quit. I will press on. Why? Because I believe The Discipled Leader’smessage is essential. It helps people become better leaders through growing closer to Jesus, becoming his disciples. There is no higher call than that. 

***

This isn’t the first time I’ve experienced rejection. How about you? Have you heard anything like?

  • We like your work and skill set, but we’ve decided to go in a different direction
  • We regret to inform you that you’ve not been accepted
  • I’m afraid we have to pass on your proposal

All of us will experience some form or fashion of rejection during our lifetimes. The question is, how do we handle rejection? Here’s what I’ve learned . . .

It Hurts: I wish I could tell you that the news I received didn’t affect me. It was tough reading Waldo’s email in the middle of a meeting and trying to stay focused. I was angry, frustrated and deeply disappointed all at the same time. I said a brief prayer to God and sought his help. I said, “Lord, if this is a vision you gave me, please intervene and make a way for this dream to come true.” Over a short period, I processed my emotions and decided not to be a victim. I shifted my thoughts and silenced my inner critic. I pivoted from doubting to believing and remembered that the rejection didn’t define me.

Remember Why: I wrote The Discipled Leaderto help others become better leaders through discipleship. I’ve seen God use the message and content to make a positive difference in many lives. The book and platform are my calling. I want to glorify God and make him know. That’s my “why.” A little rejection won’t deter me from my calling or mission.

Keep Going: Rejection can be considered a setback; an obstacle, delay or circumstance that prevents you from advancing. However, the key is to persevere, not give up and continue to take risks. I take comfort from the list of famous books that were rejected multiple times by editors, agents and publishers including Gone with the Wind, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Moby Dick, The Wizard of Ozand Chicken Soup for the Soul. Recognize any of them? I know if I keep going, something good will happen, God willing.

I’m very encouraged by what the future may hold. I remain steadfast in my mission. 

When you encounter rejection or other setbacks, I hope that you will acknowledge that it hurts, remember your why and keep on keeping on. If you do, you’ll be on the road to achieving your dream.

***

If you enjoyed reading this article and benefited by it, would you help me by doing two things?

  • SHARE the post on social media
  • DOWNLOAD the FREE chapter from my soon to be published book, The Discipled Leader. Please read it, share your thoughts with me and pass it along to someone who may benefit from the chapter’s message. Click on the header “Free Chapter” for more details.

Thanks for reading!

Pres

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Preston Poore

I’m a disciple of Christ and an executive at a Fortune 500 Company. In my blog, The Discipled Leader, I draw on my diverse business experience to help Christians connect their secular and spiritual lives at work.

As a certified coach, speaker, and trainer with the John Maxwell Team, I help others grow their relationship with Christ, develop their leadership skills, and understand how they can make a positive difference in today’s chaotic world.

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